Cheryl Tweedy is still hot.  (Popoholic)

Mila Kunis has good jeans — not to mention genes.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Hayden Panettiere flashes her boxer briefs.  It’s even less exciting than that sounds.  (IDLYITW)

Once again, Britney Spears is a MILF.  (The Superficial)

Now that Axl Rose is finally releasing Chinese Democracy, Dr. Pepper is still promising to give everyone in the States a free soda.  Of course they had to gay-up the process of getting said soda.  (Ultimate Guitar)

Vanessa Hudgens has learned her lesson from her naked pictures getting plastered all of the net.  (WWTDD)

Since the desert wasn’t hot enough, Christina Aguilera showed in in Abu Dhabi.  (Just Jared)

Break unleashes their biggest gallery ever.  (Break)

Oh look here, a Halloween themed Break Gallery.  (Break)

Break was kind enough to churn out another lovely gallery filled with stuff and such and whatnot.  (Break)

Abigail Clancy is starting to become one of my favorite super hot chicks that I’m never going to sleep with.  (Egotastic)

Kendra Wilkinson with short, brown hair?  Sure, why not.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Ever wonder where Playboy Playmates go after they stop getting naked?  Yea, me neither.  (Asylum)

Christina Aguilera is apparently an Egyptian Pharoah now.  If Egyptian Pharoah’s were blondes with big tits.  (Socialite Life)

In case you’re preparing for the end of the world, here’s what would happen if a Meteor impacted the Earth.  (Geekologie)

I have no idea who Michelle Hunziker is, but it’s my new mission to get inside her pantalones.  Some say it’s a mission from God.  (IDLYITW)

Apparently, it clearly states in the contract that I wrote to myself that I am not allowed to end a day’s postings on offensive or objectionable material, such as the post about Madonna being released from her tomb.  So, to make up for this failure in contractual obligations, here’s Keeley Hazell reenacting some famous photos/scenes of Madonna, Christina Aguilera, and Britney Spears, but this time with more boobies.  Hooray!

NOTE: The thumbnails contain NSFW images of topless boobies.

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Photo: Zoo

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For the first time in its history, Us Magazine has reported on something that didn’t make the Universe almost tear in half.  The bust size of Christina Aguilera’s enormous boobs.  Does Us deserve a Pulitzer?  Is Grey’s Anatomy incredibly stupid?  Us:

In the new annual Hot Bodies issue of Us Weekly, new mom Christina Aguilera — who welcomed son Max in January — shares the diet and workout secrets behind her 40 pounds weight loss (see more post-baby bods here).

In the interview, she also finally addresses the famous growth in her chest that came from breastfeeding.

“It’s kind of hilarious! I’ve never fit into an E-cup before,” she tells Us. “I look at my husband and go, ‘Guess what size this bra is?’ And when I tell him, he’s just amazed. We keep the tags that prove it, to look back for memory’s sake!”

E-cup?  Sweet crap.  What’s even better is that Christina is still really hot and does not have to weigh 700 lbs to achieve such large boobs.  She just had to give a lot of money to a surgeon and get pregnant.  Part II of that equation was where that son of a bitch Jordan BratIhopeyoudie comes in.  While the rest of the male world was stocking up on Kleenex and Jergens, that asshole was plowing the bejesus out of Ms. My Rack is Fucking Huge.  But let’s not dwell on that tragedy.  Let’s focus on the women following Christina Aguilera’s lead and getting huge boobs by way of some slicing and dicing, and a sperm invasion.  I for one am more than willing to help the ladies with the second part, but there is of course the “Me Running to Mexico” stipulation post-coitus.  Those crafty Mexicans and their alluding the law.

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I’m almost 100% certain that Christina Aguilera’s shirt was once composed of a full neck, but over the day her gigantic boobies ate their way through the material, which is just greatness.  I’m also fairly certain that Jordan Bratman is the smartest man to ever live.  Leonardo Da Vinci is the poster child for Downs Syndrome compared to Mr. Bratsonofabitch.  That is the only rational explanation on how he was able to successfully impregnate Christina without a dump truck full of roofies.  A hot blonde with enormous juggs, who is also really talented, and really rich is not supposed to bed down every night with someone who looks like a cross between a wombat and a potato.

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Photo: Popoholic

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