It’s nice to see that Megan has taken after one of the greatest geniuses of our time, Heather Graham, and decided that bras are silly. It’s also nice to see that Megan thought that a curtain was a good choice for a dress. I couldn’t agree more. I don’t think it’s possible for her to get any sexier. I know, some of you would say that she could show up to a premiere naked, and while that may sound awesome in theory, according to my research Megan would explode into a supernova and kill us all if she were to get naked. Yes, that sounds like a tremendously awesome way to die, but are you willing to sacrifice the children for a moment of Megan Fox nudity? I am. The sign-up sheet is behind the ‘Honest Joe’s Porn Emporium’.

[View with PicLens]

Why the hell did they have this premiere in Japan? How the fuck is Megan supposed to have fun over there — they don’t have big American penis. They should have had it in a place worthy of Megan’s ridiculous gorgeousness. Like, say, for instance, my shed my neighbor’s shed. Harold is gone most of the day, and at night he gets drunk and yells at squirrels, I don’t think he’d mind and/or notice.

Apparently, the Watchmen movie is finally opening in theaters.  I don’t give a fuck.  I don’t even know what the Watchmen is all about.  Based on the TV commercials, it’s a comic book adaptation that is not The Dark Knight, so it’s obviously going to suck.  However, hot chicks like Vanessa Hudgens seem to be interested in it, and if this movie that will probably suck keeps getting hot chicks to wear the shortest, non-porn skirts possible, it’s already an astounding success.

A real-life Death Star would bankrupt the entire galaxy.  (Geekologie)

Rihanna’s legs are looking mighty fine.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Kristen Stewart looks like hell.  (IDLYITW)

Ashley Judd doesn’t agree with Sarah Palin “hunting” wolves from a goddamn helicopter.  (The Superficial)

Robert Plant explains why Zeppelin won’t be banging groupies around the world.  (Ultimate Guitar)

The 47 sexiest Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Models of all-time.  I will fight anyone to the death who doesn’t say Marisa Miller.  (COED)

Ah, Google Maps, thank you for capturing these great moments.  (urlesque)

The world’s largest boobs come in at a stupifying — and slightly racist — 38KKK.  (Asylum)

A couple hundred photos of WWE Divas. Reminding us that even though professional wrestling is mind-numbingly stupid…  Hm…  Yep, don’t know where I was going with that.  (Manofest)

Someone needs to explain to Harper’s Bazaar that this is not how you do a Scarlett Johansson photoshoot.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Nikkie Sanderson is new.  Someone should’ve explained to her that all new models are required to be naked.  (IDLYITW)

The Superficial’s gallery of Celebrity Plastic Surgery Gone WTF.  I think this was a bad idea.  (The Superficial)

Jane’s Addiction reuniting for a tour.  I am immensely indifferent.  (Ultimate Guitar)

When did Nikki Cox get molested by the ugly tree?  (WWTDD)

Wii Sports has knocked Super Mario Bros. off as the best-selling game ever.  (Geekologie)

A collection of 100 celebrity mug shots. (ABC Action News)

Damn, Carrie Underwood is fucking hot.  (Popoholic)

Break’s biggest gallery ever, again.  (Break)

Cheryl Tweedy is still hot.  (Popoholic)

Mila Kunis has good jeans — not to mention genes.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Hayden Panettiere flashes her boxer briefs.  It’s even less exciting than that sounds.  (IDLYITW)

Once again, Britney Spears is a MILF.  (The Superficial)

Now that Axl Rose is finally releasing Chinese Democracy, Dr. Pepper is still promising to give everyone in the States a free soda.  Of course they had to gay-up the process of getting said soda.  (Ultimate Guitar)

Vanessa Hudgens has learned her lesson from her naked pictures getting plastered all of the net.  (WWTDD)

Since the desert wasn’t hot enough, Christina Aguilera showed in in Abu Dhabi.  (Just Jared)

Break unleashes their biggest gallery ever.  (Break)

Oh look here, a Halloween themed Break Gallery.  (Break)

Elizabeth Hurley still pulls off some of the best cleavage around.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Dammit, Diora Baird!  Dress goes down, not up!  (IDLYITW)

Pamela Anderson’s super cleavage invades London.  (The Superficial)

Duff McKagan says, “America isn’t very rock n’ roll anymore.”  I’d trust him, this man once drank his pancreas into submission.  (Ultimate Guitar)

Erin Wasson wore a see-through dress to some event at some place last night, that’s not important.  What is?  See-through.  (WWTDD)

Bar Rafaeli is the hottest specimen walking this Earth.  (Popoholic)

The 10 Hottest Import Models of All Time.  (Unibrow)

5 Retarded Space Travel Ideas (That Might Actually Work).  (Cracked)

Ya know how the majority of Sports Announcers suck giant anus?  Well, here’s the 21 biggest rim-jobbers

of all.  (The Angry T)

Brooke Hogan dons another bikini.  I don’t know if I should touch myself or unlock the shotgun.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Watch out paparazzi, Lindsay Lohan is throwin’ fists.  (IDLYITW)

Los Angeles County should use Kim Kardashian’s giant ass as a billboard.  (The Superficial)

Pacific Ocean had to be refilled after Jennifer Lopez made it to the swim portion of the Malibu Triathalon.  (WWTDD)

Another Break gallery filled with hot chicks, their boobs, and other stuff you don’t care about.  (Break)

History’s 7 Most Terrifying Romances.  (Cracked)

I’m moving to Hawaii.  Hopefully I shall run into the 10 Hottest Hawaiian Babes of All Time while I am there.  (Unibrow)

Jessica Alba takes her post-pregnancy boobs for stroll.  I move into some nearby bushes.  (Egotastic)

Sophie Monk wears a shirt, and that’s about it.  (Hollywood Tuna)

Ever since I watched “Leprechaun” in 1992 I’ve been afraid of having my gold stolen by midgets dressed in green suits embroidered in clovers.  Ever since Tila Tequila strutted onto the scene I’ve been afraid of having my gold stolen by midgets dressed in green suits embroidered in clovers while their “bisexual” stripper sister plays “Dodge the Boulder” with my balls.  But, on rare occasions, Tila is able to bang-up some sexy and cause me to run headlong into the screen in an attempt to mount.  I’ve already spent $1,100 on new monitors because of these pictures.

Photo: Hollywood Tuna

- Bluto -

Oh.  My.  God.  I’m pretty sure we’ve just found the one and only alternative energy source.  I guarantee that Marisa Miller generates just as much (probably more so) energy as the sun through all the hotness emanating from her.  I wholeheartedly volunteer to go on a mining expedition in Marisa’s nether regions, but I can’t guarantee I will return with the results. Sweet Jesus humping a polar bear, she’s fucking hot.  Have any of you asshats finished those designs on that cannon that will enable me to launch her husband into the center of the galaxy?

Photo: Egotastic

- Bluto -