I think I’m being a little generous by calling that thing a “top”. It pretty much looks like Katie took a net and stretched and cut it a bit, which as you’ve probably already guessed, is one of the best decisions she’s ever made. It’s too bad she stopped the thought process when she did. [...]

It’s nice to see that Megan has taken after one of the greatest geniuses of our time, Heather Graham, and decided that bras are silly. It’s also nice to see that Megan thought that a curtain was a good choice for a dress. I couldn’t agree more. I don’t think it’s possible for her to [...]

Seriously, those things could cut diamonds. Frozen diamonds. Did you see what I did there? I emphasized that Posh’s nipples are so erect that they could cut an inconceivably hard diamond. What? Oh, I’m sorry, was that commentary not up to your standards? Would you like to do it? Fine, here, knock yourself out. I’ll [...]

Damn, Heather needs to make more movies. If things keep going this route she should be naked by her third premiere. Also, if that diagram I sent to her publicist works out, Heather should be in my room by midnight. The post office man said I was a jackass because I had written everything in [...]

There is no way in hell that Sharon would not have realized that her fake old lady tits would’ve been on full display in that thing when the flash bulbs started going off.  Seeing as how she’s not even remotely relevant these days, this seems like nothing more than a, “Hey!  Look at me!” attempt.  [...]